Thursday, July 29, 2010

Why I'm Generally the "Mean" Parent

You know how in every family, there's the mean and crotchety disciplinarian and then the super happy fun time goof ball? Well, most of the time I'm the mean one. I lay down the law around my house. I believe it all stems from the fact that I typically don't like children, so I'm hyperaware of how my children are acting and bugging other people who are like me. It's the golden rule, people!

Sometimes I get it into my head to be the nice parent, but when I do it usually backfires horribly and I remember why I so very much enjoy being the mean one.

Today I took the kids outside to mess around in the sprinkler and play in the pool while I read a book (omg I have so many books to review on here it's not even funny). No sooner did I get outside when the heavens opened and a torrential downpour happened. Okay, I can stay calm. Ushered the kids inside, and decided that we would have a movie afternoon instead. Our Netflix came today, and it was "Where the Wild Things Are" which for SOME REASON I thought would be for children when it's really not at all. But that's beside the point. I made myself a bowl of soup and both kids a bowl of spaghetti-os that we would eat picnic style under a tent while watching the movie. SEE!? I'm fun!

I put the food and three glasses of apple juice on a tray and carried it upstairs to the loft. I places it on one of the large logs of our railing while I put the DVD in. Literally the second I turned around, Andrew scaled the couch, reached as far as he could and crashed the entire affair onto the couch.

And then starts crying.

Like, really baby? You're going to cry? How about I cry? Because now I have to scoop gross noodles, chicken and mushy vegetables up from my couch and throw them into the garbage. Oh, and everything smells like Chef Boyardee.

So after having a minor meltdown in which I realized that time out doesn't work on babies and there was no way to SHAME Andrew, I cleaned up the mess. While I was at it, he managed to dump my Sprite over his head. More crying ensued. We tried to watch the movie anyway, but it is so very uninteresting for children. And uninteresting for me, as it were, seeing as I fell asleep. No worries though, my lovely children made sure I didn't get more than 30 seconds in.

They got early naps.

So, I'm back to being the mean parent. Being nice just gets me a couch full of canned goods and an extra load of laundry. Totally not worth it.


Morgan -Ing said...

Oh poor Jae and poor Andrew. :)

Sheriece said...

I am laughing my head off because I totally know how this feels... yesterday Carter yanked my glass of Diet Coke off the kitchen counter, onto his head, and cried. Sigh. I'm the one that should cry - soda on my kitchen CARPET! and no more Diet Coke! HELLO!!

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