Monday, April 12, 2010

Rocky VI

Those of you who are on my Facebook (lucky!) probably read about my poor son's experience with the wasp. But I am a mean parent and definitely take pictures of my children's various misfortunes, so I should write it out. Especially because just posting the picture may be grounds for someone to contact DCFS on me and send them in my general direction.

The other afternoon I had put Andrew down for a nap in his room. Can we take a moment to talk about how deliciously sleepy my children are? Andrew sleeps twice in the day, and Addison once, and I have them coordinated so that I get three blissful hours of quiet time each day. It is lovely. Anyhow, I put Andrew down for nap numero uno when Addison was playing with her friend Kalin, in the loft. An hour later, I heard him yelp and then start crying. I went in to see what was wrong, and a wasp was scuttling away. I brushed at it with my hand and it stung ME! HOW DARE HE? I smashed it with Addison's shoe roughly 6,000 times before helping Andrew out.

I'd like to also point out that I. HATE. STINGING. INSECTS. Of any kind. I also hate moths and birds, but you already knew that. I very vividly remember the first time I was stung by a bee. I was six, and I had just walked home (OMG, walked home, those were different times. Apparently my mother was not very concerned about me getting kidnapped by a child molester. I wouldn't either; I was an ugly kid.) from my friend Kerri's birthday party. I was sitting on the garage steps showing my loot bag (which as a child, thought were call "loop bags") to my dad when a bee crawled up my shorts and stung my thigh. I was devastated. It ruined birthday parties for me forevermore.

Fast forward about 20 years. When Addison was a baby, I was putting her to bed. I bee crawled on my foot and when I went down to smack it, it stung my foot and my hand. I COMPLETELY overreacted. Justin was outside working on something house-related, and I screamed out the window like I was dying. He came running in, applied a bag of frozen bees, rolled his eyes and went back to work.

So, I think we've established I hate stinging insects of any variety, right? Well, anyway, apparently so does Andrew's EYE. My littlest brother used to swell up when stung by a bee, so I think Andrew might have inherited that. Why he couldn't inherit something cool, I don't know. For the next three days, it looked like I was a severe child abuser.

The kid looks like the next Rocky.

He was okay with it though... And when he smiled it didn't look nearly as bad because he also inherited my super squinty eyes. Hooray!

PS, Admire his crazy teeth. They have grown in the following pattern: Top left, bottom right, top right, bottom left. WTH??


Carolyn said...

Oh, how sad! I hate those same insects. For reals, get rid of all of them! Hopefully his eye heals soon :)

Morgan -Ing said...

Poor baby! I am terrified of stinging insects.

Manda said...

Are you aware that you wrote:
"applied a bag of frozen bees"

How sweet of Justin to kill all those bees and freeze them to make a compress for your bee sting! :)

P.S. Andrew is adorable!

Jae said...

Hahaha Manada. I'm so stupid. It was all just to get back at the stupid bees. Can you believe I write for a living?

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